Conection-journey-Getting-the-love-you-want-Imago-workshop

Getting the Love You Want: A Psychologist’s Journey Into One of the World’s Most Transformative Relationship Workshops

After decades of working as a psychologist, couples therapist, and trainer, I thought I had seen it all when it came to helping people reconnect. Then I experienced the Getting the Love You Want weekend Imago couples workshop. It was unlike anything I had ever encountered: powerful, practical, and deeply moving, and it changed the way I think about relationships, both in my professional work, and in my marriage.

Grounded in Imago Relationship Theory, and Therapy, this internationally acclaimed program is not only for romantic couples. It is equally powerful for therapists, friends, colleagues, parent–adult child pairs, and adult siblings anyone who wants to communicate more effectively, understand each other more deeply, and build a relationship that lasts.


Where it all Began – A Love Story with Challenges

The Getting the Love You Want workshop was created by Dr Harville Hendrix, and Dr Helen LaKelly Hunt in the late 1980s. Their vision grew from both professional expertise, and personal crisis.

At one point, Helen, and Harville’s marriage was on the brink of collapse. They had even flown to New York to tell their children they were divorcing. Before meeting them, they wandered into a bookstore. That chance moment sparked deep conversations about love, safety, and connection. From that turning point, they developed the concepts and practices that became Imago Relationship Therapy (Hendrix & Hunt, 2017).


Meeting Helen in Las Vegas

A few years ago, I had the privilege of meeting Helen at the Imago International Conference in Las Vegas. She shared that story with me in person, and her openness, humour, and hope struck me. Hearing directly from one of the founders reminded me that Imago is not just a therapy model. It is a lived experience, forged in the fire of real-life relationships.


From Pain to a Global Movement

Since its creation, Imago Relationship Therapy has grown into a worldwide movement helping couples, families, and communities. In recent years, Helen, and Harville have refined their work into the 5Rs framework, a clear roadmap for creating and sustaining safe, connected relationships (Hendrix & Hunt, 2021).


The 5Rs: a Roadmap for Re-Connection

When you attend the workshop, you are guided through five key steps:

  1. Re-Commit – Making a conscious choice to invest in your relationship.
  2. Re-Image – Seeing each other with fresh eyes, free from past assumptions.
  3. Re-Structure – Learning the Intentional Dialogue, a structured way to speak and listen without defensiveness.
  4. Re-Romanticise – Rebuilding joy, appreciation, and playfulness.
  5. Re-Vision – Creating a shared vision for the future you both want.

Each step is practised in real time with your partner, colleague, or family member, so you leave not just inspired but equipped with tools you can use immediately. The bonus of having your personal workshop manual to refer to post-workshop is undeniable.


Common Fears

Many people hesitate before attending, wondering:

  • Will we have to share personal details in front of strangers?
    No. This is not group therapy. All personal work happens privately in your pair.
  • Is group sharing mandatory?
    No. Group sharing is optional and focuses on insights, not private stories.
  • What if we argue?
    The safety and structure of the Intentional Dialogue mean reactive patterns are stopped before they spiral. Our team will be there to assist you. You don’t have to go it alone.

While you work privately, seeing others practise can be inspiring. Many participants say that witnessing another pair’s courage helps them believe change is possible in their relationship.

Each step is practised in real time with your partner, colleague or family member, so you leave not only inspired but also equipped with practical tools you can start using straight away. You will also take home your own workshop manual, a valuable resource you can return to again and again to keep building your connection long after the workshop ends.


Is it Only for Couples?

While many people attend with their romantic partner, the workshop is equally powerful for:

  • Therapists attending with a colleague for professional development
  • Parent, and adult child pairs
  • Adult siblings
  • Friends or business partners wanting a deeper understanding and improved communication

Why this Work Matters to Me

As psychologists, and as a married couple, Chris, and I do not just teach relational skills; we use them. The Getting the Love You Want tools have helped us navigate differences, dramas, disconnects, deepen our understanding, and stay connected through the ups and downs of life.

Attending this weekend workshop with Chris years ago was so powerful, I am now on the journey to becoming a certified Getting the Love You Want Workshop presenter. My goal is to share this life-changing work with couples, families, and colleagues here in Australia soon.


Be the First to Know

If you are curious about the Getting the Love You Want workshop and would like to be the first to hear when I offer it, you can join my mailing list here for updates. I would love to one day meet you and share this wonderful journey with you.


References

Hendrix, H., & Hunt, H. L. (2017). Doing Imago relationship therapy in the space-between: A clinician’s guide. Routledge.


Hendrix, H., & Hunt, H. L. (2019). Getting the love you want: A guide for couples (20th anniversary ed.). St. Martin’s Griffin.


Hendrix, H., & Hunt, H. L. (2021). The space between: The 5Rs of safe and connected relationships. Penguin.


Johnson, S. M. (2019). Attachment theory in practice: Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) with individuals, couples, and families. Guilford Press.


Gottman, J. M., & Silver, N. (2015). The seven principles for making marriage work (2nd ed.). Harmony.


Tatkin, S. (2016). Wired for love: How understanding your partner’s brain and attachment style can help you defuse conflict and build a secure relationship. New Harbinger.

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